News Bulletin : Men and Women are not alike by Angeline N. Ong

Sure, you thought you already knew that. But now we have conclusive proof!
After countless hours of surveys and studies on the following topics, these facts have emerged.

---

SEX
Women prefer 30-45 minutes of fore-play !
Men prefer 30-45 seconds of fore-play.
Men consider driving back to her place as part of the fore-play !

---

 
BATHROOMS
A man has at least 6 items in his bathroom – a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn.

The average number of items in a typical woman’s bathroom is 437 !
A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

---

JEWELRY
Women look nice when they wear jewelry.

A man can get away with wearing one ring, and that’s it. Anymore than that, and he will look like a lounge singer named Vic.

---

LOW BLOWS
Let’s say a man and a woman are watching a boxing match on television, and one of the fighters is felled by a low blow.
The woman says, “Oh Gee that must hurt”
The man doubles over and actually feels the pain.

---

DRESSING UP
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, get the mail ….

A man will dress up for: weddings, funerals,… etc

---

MAGAZINES
Men’s magazines often feature pictures of naked women.
Women’s magazines also feature pictures of naked women.

This is because the female body is a beautiful work of art, while the male body is hairy and lumpy, and should not be seen by the light of day !

---

MENOPAUSE
When a woman reaches menopause, she goes through a variety of complicated emotional, psychological and biological changes. The nature and degree of the changes varies with the individual.

Menopause in a man provokes a uniform reaction. He buys aviator glasses, a snazzy French cap, and leather driving gloves, and goes shopping for an expensive foreign sports car!

---

WEDDINGS
When reminiscing about weddings, women talk about the “ceremony”.
Men talk about “the bachelor party ”.

---