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CONGRATULATIONS! CONGRATULATIONS! CONGRATULATIONS!

World Menopause Day 2004, Essay Competition Winners

   “COPING WITH MENOPAUSE”

When I was (much) younger, I remember how every month I would think to myself, how nice it would be when the “curse” would end and I’d finally be free of buying, storing and discarding those horribly necessary sanitary napkins, and of feeling bloated and lethargic, of having cramps which would leave me curled up in bed at nights and dreading to go to the office in the mornings.

Well girls, be careful what you wish for – because before you can say “There actually IS a Menopause Society in this country!”, the months and years will have flown by, and you’ll be where I am now. I was pre-menopaused at 48; for 2 years,I endured erratic periods varying inconsistently from 3 weeks to 2 months apart, which made me long for the regular, stress-free 29-day cycles I had been so accustomed to for almost 35 years. Not to mention the uncontrollable gushes which came without warning, necessitating many visits to the ladies and many changes throughout any given day, and yes, the infamous “hot flushes”.

No matter what the books and health information handouts say, as long as you’re still menstruating, you ain’t seen nothing yet! Despite all the literature I’d read and heard about hot flushes, nothing prepared me for the incredible heat that would envelop me in the wee hours of the night, beginning from the back of my neck and growing around to my chest. In the beginning, I was at a loss to explain being woken up, at around 2.45 am almost like clockwork, perspiring on my bed at night. And of course, this had to happen to me during one of our inexplicable “El Nino”-type heat waves, when even air-conditioning didn’t help. My sleep patterns were a total wreck.

It’s quite an experience to have had those hot flushes; seriously, while it was happening, it felt like I was being barbecued from the inside out, on a flaming satay grill!! I had to resort to many tubs of ice-cream to try to keep cool during the day, and up to 5 showers daily. Later, it was midnight showers before bed, ice packs melting slowly into my pillow and showers first thing in the mornings. If I woke up during the night, I had to wring wet towels to periodically wipe my neck, chest, arms and legs in order to cool off. I even took to sleeping with only a singlet on, instead of my usual jammies! My blue gel cold packs were really handy – they would be cooled in the refrigerator in the day, and in the evenings, I would place one on my forehead to cool down; when the coolness wore off, I’d alternate with the second one. This also led me to the idea of leaving rolled-up towelettes in the fridge, just like in the Japanese restaurants, to be used for wiping myself during the day, or “mat leong” in Cantonese!

Which brings me to my next recollection – chronic insomnia! For the some time, I was puzzled as to why I kept waking up at almost exactly the same time every night, despite having no afternoon naps and maintaining my regular sleeping habits and routine. Like clockwork, my eyes would just pop open, one look at the bedside alarm and I would groan out loud – there it was again 3.15 am blinking redly and tauntingly at me. And then I would lie in bed, wide awake for at least a couple of hours. In those wee hours, I ended up making mental lists of the next day’s menu and marketing, the chores I would be doing and figuring out new ways to decorate my living room! Thank goodness, after about 6 months, I resumed uninterrupted sleep once again.

I think the insomnia was one of the worst effects of my pre-menopause stage, and occasionally, sleepless nights do recur now and then. But instead of tossing and turning, I use those long minutes and hours on some mental stimulation, which would soon bore me and I’d drift back to sleep! I must stress here how vital it is to have a good support mattress and a comfortable contour memory pillow to ensure a good night’s sleep. Believe me, every little thing helps!

In my case, I have an additional health concern – I have been on medication for mild hypertension for almost 25 years now, but happily with improvements along the way, I have swapped from a stronger to a less potent brand, and have reduced my dosage from 100 mg to 50 mg daily. I watch my diet, I weigh 20 lbs. less now than I did 20 years ago, and I make sure I have my walking exercise at least 4 times a week. I try to do as much housework as possible by hand, and minimize on kitchen and household appliances so that every task becomes a little exercise in itself.

Nowadays, I stick to regular meals at regular times, and I take yogurt for breakfast which I never miss. I cook at home and include a lot of soya products such as “tau kwa” and “tempe” in my meals. And every day, I must have my soya protein drink. The soya drinks are a firm favourite of mine and I just cannot miss them. I feel extremely clever whenever I read that Japanese women live the longest and also experience the least discomfort from menopause compared to elsewhere in the world! I definitely think that soya plays a big part, and I whole-heartedly promise this part of my diet to family and friends.

When I was younger, I did not believe in supplements and had not taken anything more than an occasional multivitamin now and then. Plus the fact that I could not quite afford them then, and they were considered quite a luxury. However, I was lucky to have met friends who swore by them and who introduced me to a regimen of vitamins and minerals, which I now have been taking religiously for over 10 years. I am quite certain that they have helped maintain my health and well-being to date, and also to cope with the transition from pre-menopause to menopause.

One other thing, I have done in the last decade is to actually increase my calcium intake. Besides including yogurt and milk into my diet, I have also been taking calcium tablets. This is important for maintaining my bone density at a good level, because I’m very wary of osteoporosis. There have been quite a few incidences among the elderly ladies in my family, such as the obvious stooped postures and increase in arthritic conditions, and the number of fractures and bones broken in household accidents and simple falls over the years. For me, it’s better late than never, as research has shown that bone density starts to reduce from as early as 25 years of age. My typically Chinese upbringing meant that lactose intolerance was practically built into our genes; after being weaned from infant formula, we hardly drank any milk growing up. This was a great disadvantage as far as approaching menopause and being a senior citizen was concerned, and I’m determined to make up for it!

Yes girls, I’ve graduated!! I’ve finally cleared my closet, I’ve given away all my remaining stock of sanitary napkins, and I can now enjoy each day as it comes, without any of the encumbrances and inconveniences of youth – those monthly blues!

Just wait till you join me, you’ll love it! You girls take good care and yes, there IS life after menopause!

Ms. Yam Man Hong
Ampang
Kuala Lumpur